Don't you hate when you get discouraged with things in life and find yourself in some sort of a rut? I think those moments are there to test your true character and how you decide to take the hits and recover from them. Life would be boring if everything always flowed calmly without any ripples. It's the ripples that bring the excitement, adventure, the color in our lives. Those ripples are often very difficult to bear but on the other end don't we feel great that we survived those moments? I know I do. It doesn't often happen until a few weeks or a couple of months after but if I keep my eyes open I can see a bigger picture after I survived whatever crisis I am going through at the time. This is not always easy just because as I said before I am generally not a very optimistic person. Or at least I'm not when it comes to examining my own character or life. I so wish I was the most mellow person in the world but for some reason feel like I got to guard myself. Guard myself from what? I am looking to somehow find a way to change all that. People can't relate if you barricade yourself behind a brick wall. I have to take baby steps to break the wall I have put up the past 34yrs. My plan is to start with smiling. Smiling even when it's hard to smile. When things get hairy, I will think of the something that warms my heart. It might not relate to whatever is going on either but won't matter because I will have a smile on my face. A smile is infectious. You can't go wrong with a smile. It is a positive feeling that when people see or encounter it can change a tense situation to a warm inviting one. That is how I feel about a smile. Talking is nothing without that smile. People take things wrong too often without a smile. Smiles can make all the difference in the world even for those that are stressed or hurting in some way. I am not sure what the next step will be but I sure am hoping and praying that God will be gracious enough to help me successfully knock out the first part of my brick wall. I'm sure I will have many many more bricks to knock down but this is the first step to a new me! Here we go and I am so very thankful that I have the support and love I have. Life has ups and downs and I am choosing to focus more on the ups while weathering through the downs in my life.
