Day 10 of 365

So I got off track due to health issues. So starting back up again. I will be catching up reading in the Bible so that I can have the experience of reading the it in its entirety in a year. A few things I learned this week:
1. I really need to focus on losing some weight and eating healthier. So I started setting up with a coach to hold me accountable with the goals they set for me. Baby steps to meet a large goal. I do not have a cause for the pancreatitis diagnosis, but I expected the worst as every test was coming up negative. I worried about cancer the most. Just because nothing was adding up, test was coming back negative, I am still young, and I don't have a history that would cause a risk of this happening. All I knew is I was pretty sick and had been since Saturday, then out of the blue hit with the pain I experienced. Thankfully CT did not find anything indicating my worst fear. So leads me to believe this was my wake up call to lose weight, eat right and exercise. Make the time and get it done. No excuses. Today starts my journey.

2. Just when you think you have experienced severe pain in the past, there is always worse pain than that. It put into perspective the face scale used when assessing pain. It's scary every single time you think you have reached that threshold.

3. I was saying over and over through the screams for the Lord to help me. He really did. My husband, again as always, was my biggest supporter. He sat in an uncomfortable chair for close to 24hrs in the ER without one single complaint. He brought me whatever I needed or asked and not one single time complained. This is huge because I am a big pain in his behind for so many reasons, but every time I have had a health concern never does he make me feel that way. Just know he was with me and only left to get Madyson ready, taken, and dropped off at school. Brendan was right there and refused to leave Jason or myself until he knew I was going to be ok. My goodness, my close friend/neighbor, the God send she is showed up, scared to death hearing my screams and seeing EMS show up, took Madyson and cared for her so Jason and Brendan could tend to me. Then after I made it home, she made me soup to ease me back to food. I have no idea where we would be without her and her family. My aunt, I can not express how blessed I am to have her. She is another rock in my foundation. She is my voice of reason that loves me through all the craziness and baggage I carry. She has known me and loved me longer than any other person on this earth. All these people again so strategically placed in my life. I know I am beyond blessed. 

4. I have such a strong little girl. That baby and I was home alone when I went through the most severe pain I personally have ever experienced and she not once panicked or cried. She was so calm and like a big girl she talked to the people on the phone and helped me call 911. I asked her if I freaked her out. Her response, "I was ok on the outside but on the inside I was sad and scared because you were screaming and crying" She was glued to me when she was not at school after that moment.

5. I know 100% I work with some great people. I was on the phone with a coworker when the pain came on so suddenly and strongly and she scrambled trying anyway she could to get the help I needed. The way they followed up on my condition and helped me ease back into work, I just can't express how grateful I am for them all the way up to the owners. God guided them to me and visa versa at just the right time. His timing is perfect, and even when I did not understand it at the time I see a bigger picture now as to why.

6. While I was in the hospital I was able to just be present. Observe how people interacted with me on the patient side. I heard a story from my aide who was from Michigan and how she ended up in East Texas. A story from a transport person that involved his passion for kids and his journey to adoption along with having small biological children. As he said, "when an adult commits to taking a child in,  that is a forever commitment and you can't just change your mind". I love the different stories each one of us have to provide the color into this dreary world. Every single person I was so proud to see how caring they are, how compassionate they were, and the advocacy they provided on my behalf. In the midst of what we see and read on TV/Papers/Media there is good out there, there are some really good people in this world.

My take away from all this, I am healthy, I am blessed, I have goals I am committed to keep, God is so good and always present.

My goals: Add breakfast to my daily coffee and continue to read my Bible in the morning before starting my day. Continue to read my devotionals with early morning reading and before bedtime. Fix a lunch box with fruit/veggie snacks and flavored water. (I usually don't eat breakfast or really anything until I get home at night and I don't really drink anything but coffee early then nothing until I get home). Do some activity (preferably physical) with Madyson every evening after I get home from work. There are so much more but these are the shortest most achievable goals I set today.

Wish me luck along this crazy journey I am on. Wishing all my friends and family all the blessings that lead to happiness, health, and love and peace. Thank you all for the love and support I have received the last 4 days.